OMG !!!! IM BACK

Yes peeps - i am still alive!!

the long long hiatus was merely a writer block - and a bit of thinking whether i should stick to this blog, or move on to another new blog talking about new things.

as i said in my last post - which was yeah - almost 7 months ago, this year was all about me.

So far, i have replaced 2 compact powders, a tube of mascara, bought 3 shades of blusher, 2 tubes of primer and fixer..tried on purple barbie-styled lens (and sticking with it!) and mostly glasses-free when im out and about. Dear Hubby after sooooo many years with me, finally admitted moi look better without glasses. I am pretty sure he was saying that only because i have smacked lotsa eye make-up to cover my tired panda eyes ; which actually gave him the illusion i have hot smocking eyes *ok - now someone please slap me back to reality!!*

And i am again being real to myself - fashion style of course.I can pretend that im ok with the muslimah get-up - i am vain and i like what i have and still am wearing. So im totally over with jubah and such and sticking to my original outfit and suits my body type the most.

The fight against the bulges is still on. though hubby so dearest has actually scolded me like 'pesal la nak kurus - i tak penah mintak pun ok' - langsung haku sentap wokey - when i humbly (which is not a very often occasion) admitted that baby..i dah tak leh kurus dah..ni le badan wa ok!

so the question now - sapa yg ngada nak kurus? sendiri jawab wokey

Kiddos are doing great. demam sini sana with asthma attack dekat si Azhad. Alesha is getting taller and thinly. pegang tangan pun macam pegang chopstick je gayanya. But she is one cute to be hot chick 1 day. bapak nye dah risau, aku ok aje. let her live her life.

Azhad still as headstrong as ever - if not more. hari hari kena marah sampai i think he will be the death of me - well he is also my pride n joy (too) but his strong personality is a challenge to hubby n me - sampai laki mak takut nak beranakkan mak wokey!!!

All in all life is great - friends are around me , families are still healthy - i couldnt possible ask for more (except bonus BOSS!!!!)

tata peeps,and until the muse to write is here with me again.

new year and new resolution ..again?

hey peeps,

oohh it is 2010 already? *shivers* time flies!!

havent been writing much, yes i know. but somehow, memang takde idea nak tulis. the happenings in life - of course la banyak kan. but then again, tak terasa nak tulis.

Alesha is off to school like a big girl she is. day 1 and day 2 we were waiting outside her new class. but by the 3rd day, she was ok and in fact insisted that i dropped her by at the main gate, where she walked very confidently to her own class at level 2. Mak beamed with pride tapi so sedeh too coz my baby girl doesnt need me anymore *sob* sob* oh well..life goes on.

She requested for a ballet class this year. have been talking about it since last year infact. tapi im not so confident of letting her stay away more hours at school sebab last year was her 1st year in school. She had her 1st ballet class last week, and couldn't wait to go for the next class -which is every friday. Now demanded we buy her tutu and shoe and the blardy expensive ballet gear la kan. rabak poket mak. Allocation ready dah , but not so confident of purchasing because her 'kakak malu' attitude tu kekadang makes her quit half way. sheesshhhh!! camna nak buat??

Baru masuk 1st month teacher is making notation in her reading book - REVISION AT HOME PLEASE!! nampak naa the momsy tak buat revision. apa la teacher ni. im not pushing her to read pun. so what if her classmates dah sampai book 20 she is still at her book 5? tapi sebab dah teacher remarked like that, me stressed tak tentu pasal. Plus im a bit worry coz she tends to write terbalik. Alesha is correct (she can write her full name) but sometimes 'e' ngadap 'l' and 's' ngadap 'e'. whats the penyakit? dyslexis? (sp.) rasanye tak kot. coz i know some of ur girls are also having the same prob.

nonetheless, mak masih hari hari pakai mantra 'no peer pressure! no peer pressure!' i never believe in pressuring for school excellence. Life is much more than being good in school. lagipun, setakat pandai sampai darjah 6 aje, bila dah masuk secondary ke laut buat apa? Of course im talking from experience!!

Azhad is still the baby me. Mouth is getting cleaver also. Favorite sentences ..'mama niiii...' accompanied with muka n mata yg kerut kerut pissed off giler kenkonon. 'or pweeeaaseee..' if rasa rasa permintaan akan ditolak. He is getting chubbier each day and loves me like nobody in this world. Of course la any son would loves his mother (any daugther too) but he is very expressive with his feelings..definitely my boy la kan. like suddenly mouth-kiss me with 'i youu mama..' read 'i love u mama', or hands on my cheeks and very cheeky smiles with eyes kerut kerut, followed with a big hug.

because of this, we had decided to put on hold the idea of another baby. damn..dah 2 tahun dah pun on hold, when the original plan was to have babies every 2 years. tapi mak is not complaining as this baby-on-hold thing is very much related to my new year resolution.

the vain me decided 2010 is a time for me and me and me. jan 2010 started very shitty ok! but lets not get into that. work wise too depressing. but not an excuse for me not to proced with my new year resolution.

2010 is a time to look GOOD babe! as in bodylicious-make-up-forever-stilettos-allthetimes!! but god knows la berapa lama aku nak continue pakai high heel kan coz mmg dah ada history sakit pinggang if pakai heels. nonetheless, lets see how long this year's resolution last.

until later peeps, wa nak tido dulu. i leave u with my perasan vogue pic ..of course ngan side kicks 2 orang itu kan..tata

JUA, SILA AHH PILIH KAMI..

AUNTIE JUA, SILA PILIH KELUARGA KAMI KERANA..

Kami ni ibarat keluarga 69. Pak sedara saya baru je umor 6 tahun, walhal abang sedara saya aka cousin saya dah pun nak masuk darjah 4. Itu tak termasuk saya yg dah umor 5 tahun, tahun depan.

saya rasa, bila saya besar nanti, mesti cam terkonpius nak panggey pakcik saya apa.La ni memang la abang sedara saya tu dok jerit jerit Pak Cik Pak Cik kat pak cik saya tu masa main wrestling WWF, tapi gamaknya kok nak mintak rokok sebatang ke bila dah umor 30-an nanti (uisshh idak le saya nak dorang tu merokok hookay) mesti cam awkward je gitew.

Pak cik saya tu pun satu, kekadang tersasul sasul panggil diri sendiri nama dia..(bukannya pakcik cam yang kitaorang panggey)..itu belum lagi dia panggey mama saya auntie. ada ke kakak dia , dia boleh tersasul panggey auntie.

tapi tak kisah apa pun, saya rasa gamba raya kitaorang ni memang paling GLAM skali. rasa cam boleh jadik cover kaset kumpulan rock dulu dulu pulak - ini mak saya la yang kata. Tak pun jadik gambar model susu cap gantung untuk budak budak membesar sihat.

Auntie Jua, saya tahu saya tak cukup syarat - tapi quote mama saya - ada aku kesah??? - kerana sememangnya saya ni datang dari keluarga yang suka GLAM GLAM sebegini.

So Auntie Jua, pilihla foto ni sebab saya rasa saya sefamili sangat vogue gitew..

Ini lah gambar family saya yang sangat vogue itew...




cerita sket pasal pic ni. Ni kat kampung rumah unyang saya. Nampak tak frame kat blakang tu? tu semua gambar lama lama atok/nenek/uncles etc etc mama saya. Saya pun dah tak berapa kenal la diaorang tu. semua cam dah janggut janggut buncit pun ada. yang dah meninggal sah sah la saya tak kenal kan. Rumah ni ala ala rumah tinggal la jugak. Cuma atok saya je yang balik seminggu skali tengok keliling. Chantek kan gamba saya ni!!


salam sayang;
Alesha Razan

p/s: mama saya budget budget takkan menang, so dia paksa letak 2 pic sebab giler glammer yang teramat.

Happy Birthday Abang!!

Yes..its this lil'kid birthday last Saturday.

Azhad Razan now is officially 2 years old!!

I dont really know what to write. But somehow obligated to write something just to commemorate his big day.

We had a small (small? apa kes nak dekat 30 orang la!!) makan makan with the inlaw. As many of them are not in Malaysia, majlis tu jadik sedang-sedang aje! ok la heks memandangkan maknye pun tak larat nak melayan sangat.

oohh kakak alesha harus ada yea. birthday nyer next week ni.

Thanks to the inlaws yang masak itu ini - mak masak spaghetii je- memang enak enak segalanya.

As tradition for the inlaw, any birthday celebration akan jadik celebration beramai ramai. nama dalam kek harus ada nama semua orang yea. though mak yang satu ni kenkonon nak exclusive anak-anak dia, but what the heck, budak-budak ni lagi suka bila the cuz are around.

malas nak jadik soapy nak flashback ke apa. takde idea nak menulis doink.

Happy birthday Azhad dear. may all your dreams come true

loveless us

Ive been married for more than 5 years and have been with the same guy for total of close to 15 years. Of course married life has its ups and downs. sedangkan lidah lagi tergigit kata orang. with 2 kids and more we are planning..i am ok with my life now.

but i often wonders about people around me. I have at least 4 friends who are in a loveless marriage. Yes they go about living life like anyone else. they have the occasional sex and good times vacationing and such, but being a friend whom they shared intimate stories - i just dont see love in their eyes anymore.

One outrightly declared so that she is in because of money. not to blame her since we all have loans under shared names. I was even the one who asked her to stay in the relationship when she was talking about divorce and such. Looking at her situation, i couldnt really put the fault on her. His infidelity was the breaking point.

One because of the kids. Well..we all love our kids dont we. but i just dont know how you can go home and stay loyal to a person you are not in love with. i think thats an affair-waiting to happen, but what can i say. at least he is a good father. A good husband - maybe so too, but i really couldnt blame him if he do have an affair one day. I guess, thats what happened after 10 years if u married someone 'because it was the right time' to do so.

One jumped head down into marriage life though i think it was the biggest mistake of his life. and the fact that the wifey is close to 10 years older than him will not be helping at all. Now he is lovey dovey and even expecting first born less than 5 months after being married. 2nd biggest mistake i see coming. But i couldnt be telling him that since kids shouldnt the be problems. They have bring me heavenly joy so far.

But we all know raising a kid (or kids) is not an easy tasked. most couple even fight over matters concerning kid. that will add more pressure to an already 'steaming' condition. I just hope he will be a good husband and a loyal one too.

One is still married though i really dont see the point if both of them are flirting and having relationship with other people. The relationship is a puzzle to me even.

I dont know what i will do if im in such situation. do i expect love or loyalty? could i live with just one or will i just wither and lose all hope?

Will you be in a relationship if u are not in love anymore and remain loyal though you know there is someone out there for you?

make up case

ada idea tak nak beli make up case yang rupa camna?

semenjak menjak ngengada nak touch up muka ni, giler bersepah ok make up. rasa cam ada yang ilang lak sebab part tu kat beg ni, part yg tu lak kat beg ini, tapi yg paling menyakit hati bila brush aku kemek kemek beg tak cukup panjang nak simpan brush tu.

option no.1..beli something cam ni.


Ni kira standard make casela kan. tapi aku dok pikir-pikir time travelling, ala ala ngengada nak make up muka cam burung merak color color itu ini, mesti laki aku hangin satu badan tak pasal pasal kena tambah satu luggage.tapi if letak kat rumah aje, confirm cam tersusun aje mak bapak berus ntah apa apa dalam beg aku tu kan. tapi dok pikir pikir balik cam tak cukup ke commpartment nak simpan brush tu. kang kemek lagi brush aku


Option no. 2 : standard cam ni lak


Lebih kurang cam yang no. 1 tadi la, tapi ala ala clear gitu, aku boleh la humban semua masuk. brush aku pun dah memang casing..ngan casing casing aku boleh campak dlm tu. tapi isu time nak travel nanti la. kena makan penyepak aku kang. oohh no no no..saya tak leh downsize make up saya time travel yea. kot la laki aku tetiba suh dress up gaya maut..kang ke nyesal tak cukup 'ammunition'.

option 3: ala ala beg komputer cam ni


memang menarik sebab boleh himpap masuk beg besar time travel. tapi aku dokpikir, if aku simpan kat rumah, tak ke serabut atas meja ada beg pc gabak cam ni. pastu lak, tetiba lak aku terasa nak bawak makeup kat opis, tertinggal lak dalam keta, tak pasal pasal keta aku kena pecah orang nak pau beg ni sebab ingat beg komputer. itu yang cakap cerita semua make up aku ilang ok. mau menangis kuar mata darah aku kang..

cam na eh? korang yang perasan vogue tu simpan make up kat mana?

btw: credit kepada owners of the pictures ok.

Oppss Dia dah Kantoi

oohh baru sekejapan tadi bloghopping..tetiba sangkut lak ngan blog minah ni yang baru aje masuk family aku..ohh sila jangan tanya banyak banyak, sah sah nanti kang aku lak kantoi mengata orang.

Tapi really eh..kalau orang cakap 'cakap malam pandang pandang' (hehe betul ke ni?) cakap dalam blog lagi kena cover. Hmmm ni yg buat aku nak caras entry lama lama tu.

Aku takde la nak blame minah ni coz aku paham la yang dia nak lepas tensi..tapi apa hal kutuk family aku weh!!

FIRST RULE : ko bukan kawen ngan dia aje..KO KAWEN NGAN FAMILY DIA TERMASUK LA SEPUPU SEPAPAT ETC ETC ETC. if rasa rasa nak kawen sendiri, pi kawen lari, balik register, pastu tinggal la kat ulu perlis ke mana..aku rasa cam aku takde la sedara mara ..yang jugak sedara mara laki ko kat sana.

SECOND RULE: so what kalau kawen orang sini sana bising. Itu la namanya cabaran. CINTA sampai nak muntah pun if ko tak masuk kan elemen elemen luaran tu, ko takkan tahu tahap cinta ko tu. Masa tu la ko nak test power, betul ke aku ni dah sedia..betul ke budak jantan ni responsible? ini belum lagi cabaran lepas kawen. Ishhh masalah sebelum kawen tu sekelumit aje la. Masalah anak..masalah time..dapat lak anak sakit..uwahhh boleh rasa nak letak kepala dalam pasir ok!!

THIRD RULE: tak de third rule. Aku cuma nak cakap pandai pandai la bawak diri. Dah la ko kawen ngan di antara yg ter kecik in the family, sedar sedar memang ramai la 'PENASIHAT TAK RASMI'. rasa rasa tak mau dengar, time masalah jangan lak datang jumpa family. Ini kes lempang pun, nak jumpa aku, kes tangkap polis aku gak..itu belum kes nak pinjam duit lagi. Sendiri mau ingat la.

hmm sapa agaknya sedara mara aku yg baca blog aku?hmm..nasib korang la yea. aku tak jemput sangat pun. if ada yg rasa rasa sentap tu..silala buat blog n kutuk aku cam aku kutuk minah tu. hahhaha