Thursday, August 16, 2007

our private bubble..

I am on my 24th weeks.

The feelings? I must say i cant wait to have the baby in my arms. The anticipation is very much new to me. Its this weird kinda feeling, very different from cenenots'.

Why? I dont know. During cenonet's time, it was more of exploring period for me. Every sensation is a new sensation..that triggers the deepest emotion within me.

But this lil' seed is different. Yes motherhood affects me the same but somehow its different. I know now what to expect..but more. Maybe during cenonet's time..aku rasa cam aku tak puas nak savour the feeling of having her in my arms.

Susah la nak cerita. Im happier now but in a more subtle and calm way as compared to the first time.

Im more excited..but i dont talk about it often, and would rather rub my tummy in one corner rather than telling the world that ' is kicking..'

This pregnancy is definitely more personal to me. Its like im not sharing it with the rest of the world. Its me and lil' seed in this bubble we create. Even hubby is not part of it.

Maybe this time, lil' seed will be mama's child insted of papa's baby like cenonet? I sure hope so...